A reader of the Relationship Coach Newsletter wrote in with the following question: What do you do when you've done a lot of
work and attracted a lovely person and now you're terrified you're going to blow it? Or, terrified it's going to end.
In response, here is a list of top 10 ways to blow it in a relationship right from the start.
1. Assume the person is your soul mate immediately upon meeting or shortly thereafter. Look for signs
that faith has brought you together and be amazed by the correlations in your lives.
2. Forget about your life, your friends, your self care.
When you have a soul mate, why would you need a life outside of the relationship?
3. Reveal everything, and test your partner with your worst behavior.
Let it all hang out. After all, if he or she is truly your soul mate, he or she will love you no matter what.
4. Have sex right away.
If you are meant to be together for a lifetime, might as well get started on the fun part right away.
5. Ignore anything about your partner that does not mesh with your values, lifestyle, belief system.
True love can conquer such insignificant differences.
6. Do lots of drama together. Job, family, life crisis are a great way to establish a relationship and test if you are meant to be together.
7. Spend as much time together as possible. When it's true love, you can't bear to let your partner out of your sight.
8. Ignore behavior that crosses your boundaries or hurts your feelings. It's true love, so it's OK.
9. Lavish a huge amount of attention on your partner or expect a huge amount of attention to
be lavished on you. How else would you act if you finally found your soul mate?
10. Push the relationship forward and demand that it go deeper, in spite of where your partner is emotionally.
You have the right to have the relationship be exactly how you want it to be and your soul mate owes you that.
Ok, honestly now - which beliefs/behaviors above are second nature to you? Can
you come up with alternative beliefs/behaviors that can be more productive in helping you create a healthy relationship? If not, you may want to get a relationship coach. See
